Dating a man who is separated
It’s a mentality of “this bitch owes me” and he’s speaking from the Victim position. That being said, if your separated man was unfaithful in his marriage, you need to proceed very slowly and spend extra time assessing his character, behavior, and moral code.
Two important warning signs to watch for are self-justification and blaming.
When he minimizes or avoids the topic, however, it suggests that either he has not yet worked through all the stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance); or, he hasn’t yet hashed through the legalities (or possibly even begun). He can’t just flick it off his shoulder as he would a bug. Anger is a normal and healthy phase for your separated man to go through.
This is a man who once loved his wife, believed in marriage and the family dream, and committed himself to making it work. But that doesn’t mean it’s your job to deal with it, especially when he might be stuck in this state indefinitely.
Hopefully he doesn’t decide to withdraw his trust from all women and relegate them to “only being good for one thing.” If this is separated man, you might have a ‘Wounded Player’ on your hands. He’s getting too serious too fast There’s one word that best explains why your separated man is getting really serious really fast: he’s .
The bottom line is that going through a divorce requires a lot of him – he must grieve, heal, hash through legalities, potentially adjust to single parenting and financial limitations, as well as rediscover a new sense of who he is today.If you chose to proceed in dating him, I caution you to proceed slowly and with eyes wide open. Comments like, “Bah, I just want it over,” or “Doesn’t matter, we’ve been strangers for years,” may seem casual, even confident — but they also mask what’s going on underneath and behind the scenes.When a man has truly processed his divorce and moved on, he should be able to speak to it with compassion, kindness, and wisdom.The thing about anger is that it uses up a lot of energy and space in your separated man’s brain and heart.That’s energy and space that he can’t and won’t channel into you in positive ways. He doesn’t consistently spend time with his children.